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In The Know: Are Tests Biased Against Students Who Don't Give A Shit?
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Panelists discuss the many ways in which our educational system caters to students who try, care, are awake.> |
Views:
135170
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| Time:
02:18 |
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Annoying Orange: The Onion Ring
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Four friends watch the cursed Onion Ring tape. Now the Annoying Orange is after them. THE ONION RING SHIRT: annoyingorange.spreadshirt.com TWITTER twitter.com FACEBOOK: facebook.com DAILYBOOTH: dailybooth.com STARRING BOBJ> |
Views:
6431180
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| Time:
04:19 |
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The Cursed Onion Ring Tape
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The entire cursed Onion Ring tape. Send to 5 friends or else you're an onion ring. Click here to see what happens if you don't send this video: www.youtube.com> |
Views:
1929604
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| Time:
01:09 |
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Breaking News: Some Bullshit Happening Somewhere
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Excruciating up-to-the-minute coverage of some irrelevant bullshit story that has no ramifications whatsoever.> |
Views:
811727
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| Time:
02:02 |
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COCO Y LOLA: the onion
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FDA Approves Depressant Drug For The Annoyingly Cheerful
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Made by Pfizer, Despondex is the first drug designed to treat the symptoms of excessive perkiness.> |
Views:
1272750
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| Time:
02:07 |
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Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard
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The MacBook Wheel lets consumers accomplish everyday tasks like typing with just a few dozen spins and clicks of a wheel.> |
Views:
3556139
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| Time:
02:46 |
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Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole?
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With the economy sliding deeper into a recession, panelists discuss whether it's time to stop throwing our money into a massive pit out in the desert.> |
Views:
479334
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| Time:
02:05 |
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McCain Left On Campaign Bus Overnight
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Campaign officials downplayed the incident, saying the senator was fine as soon as he was fed and taken to the bathroom.> |
Views:
219049
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| Time:
02:39 |
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Deadly Virus Sweeping China Is Just Olympic Fever
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The Chinese government explained that the fatal disease is caused by the excitement of the Olympics, not infected birds, as was previously reported.> |
Views:
176607
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| Time:
01:38 |
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Domino's Tests Limits Of What Humans Will Eat
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Despite ethical concerns about testing on humans, researchers say their work was necessary to determine the boundary between garbage and food.> |
Views:
703335
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| Time:
01:39 |
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Congress Struggles To Come Up With Cool Name For Drug Law
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Before a new program to combat crystal meth can be put into place, Congress has to make sure it has a really awesome name.> |
Views:
116979
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| Time:
02:50 |
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Sources Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013
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Unless Americans turn to alternative sources of entertainment, the 'Hannah Montana' star will soon be completely tapped out.> |
Views:
5300553
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| Time:
02:28 |
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Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election
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Our morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper.> |
Views:
488581
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| Time:
03:00 |
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Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'
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Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions.> |
Views:
1087670
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| Time:
03:02 |
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'Iron Man' Trailer To Be Made Into Feature Film
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Fans are worried that the feature film adaptation of the beloved trailer won't live up to the original 90-second story's vision. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
525486
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| Time:
02:43 |
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'9/11 Conspiracy Theories Ridiculous' - Al Qaeda
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An Al Qaeda representative says that claims the US government was behind the attacks on Sept. 11th are demeaning to Al Qaeda. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
1804107
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| Time:
02:47 |
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Are We Giving Robots Too Much Power?
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Panelists discuss whether controversial decisions by the Robot Congress and President Executron indicate robots have too much control over our lives. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
693420
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| Time:
02:10 |
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Army Holds Annual Bring Your Daughter To War Day
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Girls between the ages of 8 and 14 spent the day helping their parents fight insurgents and defuse mines. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
756279
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| Time:
01:14 |
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Anonymous Hero Donates Hospital 200 Human Kidneys
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Hospital officials hope to locate the good Samaritan that dropped off a sack of human organs in the middle of the night so they can thank him. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
703944
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| Time:
01:12 |
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Multiple Stab Wounds May Be Harmful To Monkeys
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Repeatedly stabbing monkeys with sharpened objects may have an adverse effect on their health, according to a new study. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
1680341
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| Time:
01:08 |
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Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election
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Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
364460
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| Time:
02:44 |
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'Gays Too Precious To Risk In Combat'
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Gen. McBrayer discusses how valuable homosexuals are, and why we must never put their lives at risk by allowing them in the military. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
943561
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| Time:
01:51 |
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Child Bankrupts Make-A-Wish Foundation
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Today Now! has the story of an 8-year-old whose demand for never-ending wish fulfillment may force the Make-A-Wish Foundation to shut down. More coverage at: onion.com> |
Views:
498080
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| Time:
02:24 |
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Fat Kid Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt
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Today Now! brings you the inspiring story of Brian Peete, a fat boy who hid his obesity from other children at the pool by keeping his shirt on. More coverage at: www.onion.com> |
Views:
596323
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| Time:
02:26 |
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